Bad Arguments

I gotta come clean. If there was any justice I'd come with a warning label. "Known to make bad arguments." I know it. I make bad arguments all the time. Not saying that all my arguments are bad, but I think a lot are. I try not to, but sometimes I just can't tell.

How do I know then? Because a few hours/days/weeks later, even I'm not convinced by them. And I'm the one who made it in the first place! I use terrible analogies, unfitting metaphors, maybe some hypocrisy, and occasionally some bad logic. Plus a bad habit of playing Devil's advocate or making ironic arguments just for the hell of it.

So please, please, please; when ever I go off on some bullsh*t argument, or when you know I'm wrong, just tell me. Or better yet, convince me. I try to listen to reason, but it can take awhile to sink in so I'll probably be an ass until I realize what a buffoon I am (or hold character for joke arguments). Thanks, in advance, for your patience.

Everything/Nothing Fallacy

I always hate when I hear someone say something in the form "If you x everything, than you x nothing." Like if you believe in everything than you believe in nothing, or if everyone is special than no one is. The latter, of course, being an always trendy thing for guy into counterculture platitudes. The shorter version is "If everyone's unique then nobody is." The more correct argument is "If everyone's unique than nobody is, in particular." I mean, you wouldn't say, "If everyone's alive than no one is" because that is retarded... I mean absurd. It's also a premise used against an egalitarian distribution of wealth or equal education. Probably other ideas too. Point is, it's a bad argument that keeps getting repeated. Stop it. Please.

Disclaimer: This only applies to non comparative x's. If everything is hot, then nothing is makes sense. Special is not a necessarily an adjective that compares.